When will we get the strength to...LEAVE

So it's a common consensus that me and a few of my closest friends have this recurring problem! And once you experience this issue it somehow becomes your new lifestyle...like seriously, it's hard shaking it and you even start to get a kick out of it until reality slaps in you in the face with the "you're a lady not a hoe" card! Yes I'm talking bout being the Sam Cassell of the love triangle! You find that guy that you are just soooooooooooo attracted to...ya'll have the illest connection! It's as if he was you reincarnated in a man's body so of course you're drawn to him like moths to a flame...but then he gives you that news, the news NO girl wants to hear! He has a girlfriend! So you know this is off limits and you tell yourself move on to the next, but something keeps drawing you to him (we like to convince ourselves that it's divine intervention, but let's be real...it's our minds making us do what we truly desire)! So you say "I mean...I don't want a man anyway...I'm just tryna chill!" (Plug: niggas when a girl says she's "just chilling"...NEVER believe her! Either she's lying off bat and just tryna suck you in hoping she can win you over or she's convinced herself that she's "just chillin" to satisfy the situation but her true colors will show soon and very soon)!
So u decide to kick it with homeboy...a couple lowkey dates here and there, then ya'll chilling at your crib, and finally he's fallin asleep in the bun! You knew he had a girl but figured you'd settle to have him on occasion than not to have him at all.

(When I first met you, you told me exactly how it would be; You had a lady and couldn't spend all your time with me. I only wanted to kick it, so I said 'cool, you can keep her' long as you satisfy me)

But as time progresses your true colors start showing. You're getting mad that he's always with her, he barely sees you and when he does it's for a quikie! He constantly complains about shit that's wrong in the relationship and exclaims how good you are and you're wifey material, but still...you're the side piece! You tell him you want more...some niggas will let you know...IT AIN'T HAPPENIN, yet others will give you false hope "if we didn't put so much work into this I would've left her a long time ago" or "I'm afraid she'll hurt herself if I try to leave...she's crazy"!

(But as the weeks went by I, I started feelin' strange. Somethin' was deep in my heart, somethin' I can't explain. I think I'm fallin' in love with you boy)

Either way you never truly get what you really want and deserve out of the situation!

After playing the bench the first round of the finals guess what...you get traded and ride the bench again...yes it becomes a pattern. You become so accustomed with being the side chick that it becomes a habit...that's all you seem to attract is niggas with girlfriends!

At a point in time I was Sam Cassell and half my ass cheek still rides the bench sometimes, but I've learned a few things from some very wise people!
1.NEVER settle...a nigga will only give you what you accept and will only do what you allow...
2.Enter the situation with swag mode at full velocity!! Niggas sense things...if you enter with confidence and swag that you're much better than playing sideline...a nigga won't even step to u with the bull!
3.Don't front the swag...believe it!! I always tell my friends that a nigga can't know how to deal with u if you don't know how to deal with yourself...take some ME time and get to know yourself so then you NEVER settle for bull...
4.Temporary happiness is just that...temporary...afta u go back to reality and feel like shit!

So ladies I leave you with Beyonce telling the playa she gotta leave...and some wise words from a former Sam Cassell...

"...i didn't want to end it but reason told me I had to...i be tempted to hit him up and be like I changed my mind...she'll neva know...but u an me...we deserve a guy who is ALL about you and me all the time cuz he wants to be. not cuz his girl is trippin or not around...no matter what kind of connection we deserve better..."